New Lineup for Yesterday

Inspired by the legendary Ogden Nash doggerel "Lineup for Yesterday," and by Opening Day, and by all the research sloshing around in my head from writing The Comic Book Story of Baseball:

NEW LINEUP FOR YESTERDAY

after Ogden Nash

A is for Alan, who turned two with Lou

As well as any pair ever could do.

B is for Brett, who once hit .390

But became better known for the pain in his heinie.

C is for Cabrera, Miguel of renown

The slowest man ever to win a Triple Crown.

D is for Dewey, whose cannon in right

Made runners in Fenway hold up out of fright.

E is for Edgar, DH without peer

At least until David Ortiz’s career.

F is for Fernando, the Dodgers’ El Toro

A legend from Chavez Ravine to Queretaro.

G is for Gibby, in Detroit and LA

A World Series hero revered to this day.

H is for Henderson, one of a kind

As Rickey would tell you, sure, Rickey won’t mind.

I is for Ichiro, needing only one name

And hit after hit to add to his fame.

J is for Jeter, despite his numb glove

The Yankee that haters of Yankees could love.

K is for Kid, not Williams but Griffey

Whose hitting was epic and fielding was spiffy.

L is for Larkin, the Cincy shortstop

A true model sportsman, the cream of the crop.

M is for Maddux, and Murray and Manny

It’s poetic injustice! The M’s are so many!

N is for Nolan, the Ryan Express

Seven no-hitters stand out from the rest.

O is for Ozzie, the Wizard so-called

Whose backflips and dives had spectators enthralled.

P is for Pedro, the littlest ace

The best pound-for-pound, a terror to face.

Q is for Quisenberry, KC’s submariner

Who piled up saves and kept basepaths cleaner.

R is for Ripken, the new Iron Horse

2632’s what he’s known for, of course.

S is for Steroid, the reason is clear

Why A-Rod and Barry and Big Mac aren’t here.

T is for Thome, whose bat always thundered

His number of home runs is north of 600.

U is for Uecker, not much of a catcher

But a broadcaster and pitchman of much greater stature.

V is for Verlander, Tiger fireballer

In Detroit or Houston, a sure-fire Hall’er.

W is for Wade, who found chicken delicious

No other great player was so superstitious.

X is for Expos, who found Montreal

A place where no one would watch them play ball.

Y is for Yount, the Rockin’est Robin

Milwaukee just isn’t the same without him.

And Z is for Zim, a forgettable player

But a memorable coach and dugout soothsayer.